There are many reasons that family members become concerned that an elderly loved one is not doing well. One issue that is a cause for concern is bathing or rather the lack thereof. A parent not bathing is a topic that many families are reluctant to discuss as they may be uncomfortable bringing it up. But be assured that this is an issue that many people face. It is common…but there may be multiple root causes. It is important to understand why they are reluctant. Only when you understand that the underlying reasons can you better approach and address successfully. Let’s look at some of the more common reasons.
- Fear of Falling
The bathroom can be a very dangerous place. If you have every slipped in the shower, you can relate. Now you pair the environment with physical issues like foot problems, balance issues, arthritis and more…and you have a recipe for disaster and fear.
Often elderly have issues with depression that can zap their get up and go. When you lack motivation, bathing and concerns for your grooming often go by the wayside.
- Cognitive Issues
Another reason that is very common are memory issues. If your parent has dementia or other cognitive decline, keeping up with a bathing schedule can be extremely difficult. Realizing that you haven’t taken a bath is not something they may be able to keep up with easily.
While it may be a difficult subject to approach, you must develop a plan. For some simply adding grab bars or safety equipment may help. Some may be able to follow a chart. But if it is a depression or memory issue, it may be time to consider getting help. As always discuss your concerns with a doctor. A physician may want to consider medications to help with depression. It may be time to enlist the help of a caregiver or look into an assisted living community where your loved one can have daily assistance with their activities of daily life like bathing and grooming. But don’t avoid the topic because it is messy and uncomfortable. The health benefits of cleanliness are far too important to ignore.
For most centenarians, long life is a precious gift and not a burden. At 103 years old, Sue Clark remembers most everything from her life – names of old friends, growing up on a farm in Giles County, Tennessee, details of her husband’s transfer to Redstone Arsenal, receiving a teaching degree from Martin College, enjoying a good golf game, and memories of watching her students grow. The Limestone Manor resident and retired kindergarten teacher has remained happy and healthy by staying busy (and motivating others to join the fun). She recently celebrated her birthday on March 3 with neighbors, friends, family and the mayor!
Listening to Sue Clark share fun memories was fascinating. After moving to Athens, Mrs. Clark started a home kindergarten in 1963 that helped mold and shape many a student. She created the foundation for students to use their imaginations and grow their intellect. With a twinkle in her eye, she talked about her 20 year career in teaching and the various activities she did to make learning fun. Her stories included everything from building a playhouse in the backyard to train-rides, to “Hobo Hikes” and eating a sack lunch in an open field. It was obvious that she loved children and motivating them was her biggest reward. You could tell that Mrs. Clark was having fun too!
Another thing that she enjoyed was music and being involved in church. Mrs. Clark was part of a singing group, The Merry Makers. After closing her kindergarten, she told a friend…”I have all of these band instruments left over from teaching, what can we do with them?” They organized a group that performed around town. The Merry Makers and their entertainment is what originally brought her to Limestone Manor Assisted Living, where Mrs. Clark now resides.
Sue Clark first visited the senior community singing and spreading cheer to everyone. As a resident, she now enjoys the varied activities and especially the music that Limestone Manor has to offer. But truth be told she still loves to tell stories. These she now shares with the other residents, staff, family, friends and many visitors at the Manor. Her walls beautifully display a lifetime of memories. But the true beauty of the trip down memory lane…comes straight from the source.
Someone recently asked me was the face of assisted living changing? Well I wasn’t really sure how to answer that question. I guess mainly because the faces or the people that I know within our communities are all so very different. They are different on many varied levels. Now while they all have to meet the requirements for eligibility…that still doesn’t look like one particular demographic. So if you have in your mind what assisted living looks like…let’s try this on for size. This may not be the case for all residents. But this is a more commonplace that many realize.
It is very typical for our residents within our communities to be very vibrant contributing members of society. We have folks that do charity work, volunteer to read at local schools and even pink ladies at the local hospital. I have one lady that I swear travels more during the week than I do. She has plenty of living left to do and she enjoys every minute of it. I heard her tell a friend once, “I know I don’t have to live in assisted living, but for me it is a comfort to know that someone is always there for me if I need them no matter what. She went on to say that since her husband passed away a few years back, she feels that being in our community allows her the freedom to keep going while not becoming a burden on anyone else. It is so amazing to see lives so full and abundant. Assisted living communities provide so much more than assistance with the activities of daily life. What we are able to do in most cases is make sure that the jobs of cooking, cleaning and keeping up with laundry and other tasks are handled so that seniors can focus on the truly important things in life.
So while we certainly pride ourselves in offering as much assistance as we can provide our residents, you may see that your view of what assisted living looks like may be changing for you. We encourage our potential residents and families to not wait. Keeping medications and nutrition scheduled and balanced is such a benefit that we can oversee. The assisted living model may be exactly what you need to keep you on pace with your lifestyle. Want to find out more? Give us a call today. We would love for you to join us for lunch and take a tour. Have your own opportunity to try us on for size.