How Will I Know When It’s Time For Mom To Move To Assisted Living?


As the adult child of senior parents, we often find our roles reversed as we try to help our parents navigate the challenges of getting older.  We find ourselves accompanying them to physician appointments, researching chronic health problems on line and worrying about our parents.  Often we reach a point where we become concerned about our parents safety in living alone and we just aren’t sure what the next step is.  How will I know when it’s time for my Mom to leave her home and move into assisted living?

We usually begin asking ourselves this question when we discover our Mom isn’t able to manage some part of her life in the same way she did previously.  It might be that she isn’t eating well, forgetting to take her medications, has fallen at home, or is just lonely living alone.  Whatever the issue that causes us to become concerned, there is an objective test that we can use to determine if it’s time to make the move.  Below is a quick series of questions to ask yourself (or your Mom) to help make that determination:

YES   NO    Am I bored and lonely at times?

YES   NO    Does my social life revolve around the TV?

YES   NO    Is my circle of friends shrinking?

YES   NO    Could I use more exercise?

YES   NO    Is home maintenance a burden?

YES   NO    Do I avoid driving at night or should I stop driving?

YES   NO    Are housekeeping chores not as easy as they used to be?

YES   NO    Am I caring for a spouse and it’s wearing me out?

YES   NO    Am I eating poorly? Have my eating habits changed?

YES   NO    Am I eating alone?

YES   NO    Do I worry about needing help and not getting it in time?

YES   NO    Do I want to enjoy better health?

YES   NO    Am I relying on friends and family to do things for me?

YES   NO     Is it creating a burden for them?

YES   NO     Do I sometimes forget to take my medication?

If you or your Mom answered Yes to any of the questions above, it may be time to start looking at senior living options, especially assisted living.  While it is stressful to bring up this topic, getting your Mom in a safe place where she can thrive will make your relationship better.  Helping your Mom see that she isn’t giving up her independence, she is actually moving to a place where she can be more independent because she will have extra supports to help her.  Almost 100% of senior adults moving into assisted living comment within the first week “I wish I’d done this sooner”!

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